Gaslighting

Being aware of various cyberbullying techniques and knowing how to identify them are key ways to counter them and prevent and/or stop their occurrences against you and others. So let’s delve in:

What is Gaslighting? Invalidation

Merriam-Webster’s word of the year for 2022. ‘a word for our time’ in an age of fake news, misinformation and conspiracy theories. Searches for the word increased 1740% in 2022 from the previous year.

The American dictionary’s top definition for gaslighting is the psychological manipulation of a person, usually over an extended period of time, that “causes the victim to question the validity of their own thoughts, perception of reality, or memories and typically leads to confusion, loss of confidence and self-esteem, uncertainty of one’s emotional or mental stability, and a dependency on the perpetrator”.

Many cyberbullies use their army of bullies who have an allegiance to the “main” bully. When this entire group seeks to manipulate you, spread lies about you and verbally attack you it further compounds the psychological manipulation because it is now an entire group of people so you are outnumbered. Even if you disagreed with one person now you may question your own thinking because how can 5 or 10 people be wrong? Due to their surge in numbers now you can begin to question yourself when you didn’t before. Therefore, the cyberbully army in itself can cause gaslighting to compound and affect you.

Gaslighters utilize “projection” to drive you crazy. They will project their “less” desirable qualities onto you. Call you a narcissist, an attention seeker, showy or more just to break you down and try to lower your self confidence because remember they are highly insecure and have low self esteem to even have the malicious drive/desire to do this cyberbullying to you. They are jealous, feel threatened and want to bring you down. They are either “competing” with you in their minds and feel you “beat them” in some similar space/field or they are just jealous of your confidence and success or that you are happy since they are not.

Be aware of these tactics so you can identify them. If you know how sick and demented this can be then you will KNOW you are NOT crazy. You will know that you are correct to feel the way you feel. Do not get invalidated. You are not alone. This is a very common occurrence nowadays as we spend most of our lives online.

Awareness and identification are keys to counter these vicious abusive attacks. Cyberbullying is real. You are not alone.